For our sensitive readers (also known as fuckboys), I will be discussing feminine hygiene products in this blog post . If you don’t have parts that care about feminine hygiene products, feel free to discontinue reading this post.
First, lets talk about my current loathing for Tampax brand tampons. Two cycles ago, I realized I was out of my tampons too late in the day for me to go without an emergency trip to Walgreens. I head over there, grab the box that says “sale,” make it home and realize that the box smells (I had no fucking clue that scented tampons were even a thing). There was nothing I could do, I had to use these flowery blood mops. (Mind you, this was in the middle of Maryann being in the hospital and my move. Not a cute time for me.) I figured that they HAD to be tested, so a few nights would be fine. NOPE. NO. NOT OKAY. NOT COOL. 1) WHO WANTS THEIR VAGINA TO SMELL LIKE BLOOD AND FLOWERS??! 2) CLEARLY, SATAN MADE THESE AND WHY DOES ANYONE SELL THEM? I spent WEEKS recovering from them. I had the worst allergic reaction in the worst place to have an allergic reaction. And if you’re thinking that I didn’t take those bastards back to Walgreens and demand money back, then you’re crazy.
Now, let’s discuss what lead me to learn that there’s an option beyond tampons/pads. A couple of months ago, Alison and I discovered Trash is for Tossers, which is a blog written by a girl in New York City who lives a waste free lifestyle. Because you know me so well, Kara, you’re going to know that my first thought when learning about a waste free lifestyle was how in the damn hell does she wipe her ass. Since that was my first area of concern, my next logical concern was for her monthly gift from the demon god of torture, dark chocolate, and why me. This question was answered pretty easily! The Diva Cup (or any menstrual cup – that’s just the one she uses and the one I found at Sprouts).
Let me tell you what I know about the Diva Cup. It cost me $39.95 plus tax at my local Sprouts. It will last me anywhere between 1-10 years. It’s made of medical grade silicone so I never have to worry about my vagina getting messed up from tampons (which carry some nasty chemicals into your vagina, even the unscented kinds). On average, I spend $13 every two months on tampons. In five years, this will be a savings of $350.00. That’s a lot of damn money!
My last cycle was my first time using the Diva Cup and I cannot believe how surprisingly easy it was to use. I have a light flow, so I changed it four times a day. I could have easily done less (it can be inserted for no more than 12 hours at a time without being cleaned/rinsed). It didn’t irritate me, it wasn’t difficult to insert (in fact, it was kinda stupid easy to insert), and I feel like I’m giving both my wallet and the environment a little kiss of love.
If anyone is on the fence about purchasing a menstrual cup, please give it a shot! It’s a wonderful thing.
Edit: I wrote this blog post over a month ago and I can now say with certainty that the Diva Cup is life changing. GITIT.
To the furthest star and back,