Pasta of the Gods

Hello Keddah,

First: this post is about food but

Second: story time. Once upon a time, infant, baby, small Steffi went to Pennsylvania to visit her Aunt : the ORIGINAL Aunt Steffi (to whom I will never live up to but have fun trying because seriously goddess doesn’t begin to describe my aunt). So she made me the dish I am about to make and I DIED. It featured these fancy Italian tuna filets in oil IN A GLASS JAR. And I searched. And I searched. And I COULDN’T FIND THEM. I was heart broken and devastated. Until the other day! These fuckers are at Sprouts!! So I picked me up some, frantically called my Aunt and she gave me the recipe. And she graciously (literally grace oozes out of this woman – when I say gracefully I mean gracefully) allowed me to post the recipe!

So – I’ll tell you what you need as we go because I’m incapable of planning ahead. (Or I’ll post it at the bottom?) (and fuck if I’m editing these pictures)

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Large saucepan with flat raised edges – this one is from All-Clad

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Take your tuna filets and pour the oil out of one into the sauce pan and heat it up.

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Smash the shit out of a ton of garlic and heat it up. The more garlic you use, the more Italian you are.

Open a can of tomatoes – the kind I tell you to get at the bottom cuz they’re superior – reach into the can, grab a tomato with your actual hands, not your figurative ones, and give them a good squeeze. Get all those juices out. It feels good.

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Put it in and let simmer for as long as you can handle. We have no time frame at all because we’re heathens. Add pepper.

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Tell Harvey for the billionth time that there are no Keetins Allowed In The Keetchen. He won’t listen.

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Bubbly reduced deliciousness. Start the pasta about now.

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Add the tuna (minus any oil) and capers.

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Once the pasta is almost done cooking – add the flat leaf parsley. Leave a sprinkling for the pretty garnish.

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Take some of that pasta water and add it to the sauce. This is why we didn’t add salt – this should be enough because your pasta water BETTER TASTE LIKE THE GODDAMN OCEAN.

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Add your pasta to the pan! Now, if you cooked your pasta an ounce over al dente, I will end you.

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Look at this! It’s delicious! Yum!

Recipe below and let me know if you give this a try! ❤

  • 1 lb of Linguini
  • Olive oil
  • Garlic (as many as you can handle)
  • Cento Peeled Tomatoes, Italian Style (can use two cans if you want it a bit saucier)
  • TonNino Tuna in oil with oregano
  • Capers
  • Flat leaf parsley
  • Salt and pepper
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